No One Will Ever Understand
by odetonightingale
Summary: Matthew Crawley is a servant at Downton, and Mary is unsatisfied with the men her father is trying to set her up with. Will something develop between her and Matthew? A glimpse of Mary's early years in society.
1. Chapter 2

**Greetings!  
Tonight I was watching D.A., season 3, episode 1. Matthew and Mary were being all mushy, of course. My heart started pitter-pattering for them, and that revved up my brain to promptly produce this chapter.  
Hope you enjoy!**

_Cad._

Matthew was leaning down at Lady Grantham's level as she ladled herself some green beans, but his eyes were on Mary and the troll across from her._ She's not interested, buddy._

Matthew had been at Downton for about a year now. He found his job as a footman tolerable, but most of his pleasure was taken in observing the people he served. He had never spoken to Edith, yet he heard the bitterness in her voice, the envy in her drawl. He had said only one, maybe two, words to Sybil, but he had guessed her adventurous spirit by the candor of her walk. Lady Grantham was tender-hearted, yet firm; Lord Grantham, controlling, but not without some warmth. The Dowager Countess...simply ridiculous. But he liked her. He liked them all.  
Some more than others, to be honest.

He had had one conversation with Mary. It was three weeks into his employment. He had come upon her in the library, sitting by the window, reading _Jane Eyre. _This was his favorite room, and Lord Grantham had given him permission to borrow any books that piqued his interest.

Mary started upon his entrance.

_"_Forgive me, m'lady." Matthew began to back away.

"No, no. Stay. Don't let me bother you." Afternoon sunlight was bathing her pale blue gown. She glowed. He noticed the auburn streaks in her hair, something he would not have seen in the candlelit dining hall. He took a mental snapshot of this exquisite scene, knowing he'd never forget it.

Feeling uncomfortably aware of himself, Matthew walked toward the brimming shelves of novels and stared at them without really seeing them. He stood with his back to her, unsure of what to do next. He heard the crinkle of a page turn.

Mary heaved a sigh. "I have little left in myself - I must have you."

Matthew whipped his head toward Mary, wide-eyed, heart racing... until he realized she was reading a line from her book. _Damn._

"The world may laugh - may call me absurd, selfish - but it does not signify. My very soul demands you: it will be satisfied, or it will take deadly vengeance on its frame."

Mary smirked and looked up at Matthew, who was wrinkling his eyebrows at her.

"Imagine that. To burn with such passion. It seems utterly exhausting." She smiled and took note of Matthew's reddening neck.  
_Is this inappropriate?_ She wondered. She wasn't one to converse with the servants very often, but she was in one of her social moods, which always occurred a few days before her menstruation.

_Is this inappropriate? _Matthew wondered. _Say something_, _you fool._

Matthew cleared his throat. "To love is to labor, of that I am certain."

The sound of his voice took him by surprise. _Where the hell did you get that from? _Embarrassed, he quickly one-eightied and reached for the nearest book in front of him.

Mary chuckled softly. "I'm not accustomed to that kind of work. Are you?"

Matthew froze, his body flooding with heat. He did not dare turn around.

"Never mind, never mind. I'm being intrusive. That's enough reading for me today." Mary placed _Jane Eyre_ o_n _the stool next to her and stood up. "Your name is Matthew, correct?"

Matthew faced her with a book open in his hands. "That is correct, m'lady."

"Well, Matthew. Enjoy...what is that book you're holding?"

"Uh." Matthew closed the book and looked at the cover. _"Persuasion._ Jane Austen." He winced.

Mary giggled. "Enjoy _Persuasion_. You really are a romantic, aren't you?"

All Matthew could do was shrug, and curse his bashful manners. Mary walked out of the room. Matthew sat down in her chair, punched himself in his mind, and began to read Jane Austen for the first time in his life.

Naturally, he had fallen quite hard for Lady Mary. What's a footman to do?

**WHAT DO WE THINK? Does poor, awkward Matthew stand a chance? Ugh. So cute. So uncomfortable.  
Review, please!  
**


	2. Chapter 1

Gloves on, hair coiffed, pearls in place- Mary Crawley drifts down the spiral staircase already yawning, prepared for another night of eye-rolling. Another dinner party. Another night hiding behind a wine glass and a jam tart. Another night of strange "gentlemen" groveling at her feet. _Good God_, Mary thought. _How many more card games must I endure? _

Mary takes a bite of kidney soufflé as the latest troll sits across from her, eyeing her collarbone, his pink lips curling into compliment mode. "Lady Mary, you are looking _well_. Why, the last time I saw you was during your presentation at court. You looked like quite a young girl, but now! My goodness. You've certainly...ah...blossomed." His voice lowers, his eyebrows rise to his hairline, and Mary's soufflé rumbles uncomfortably as it settles in her middle. She looks up at him and smirks, gripping her knife. "Is that so?" she manages to reply, hoping he'll detect the _ew_ in her eyes. "I don't remember seeing you at court." He chuckles, wipes his mouth, and continues to stare at her.

Who is she kidding? No man will ever understand the dark, amber-flecked glare of Mary Crawley.


End file.
